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Jun 16
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Men, Nature, and God

Posted on Tuesday, June 16, 2009 in Male Spirituality

 

Heading in to camp with Dal and my Dad after a great evening of fishing.

Heading in to camp with Dal and my Dad after a great evening of fishing.

ADAM, in Hebrew, is not so much a proper name as a general description of the male of the species, “adamah” or creature of the earth.  I like “Man of Earth,” or “men of the earth.”

I bring up this first point because of my interest in what is called male spirituality, in contrast to a feminine spirituality.  My interest and concern has arisen from my disappointment (and subsequent feelings of failure) in the number of young men who grow up in the church and then leave the church for good.  I have to admit my first concern was with an insider/pastor bias. “How can we get and keep men involved in the life of the church” (as if the only place to find God and live the life of faith is within the context of the church)?  But I have realized that getting men to church isn’t the goal, it’s guiding men into their inner soul and spiritual journey with God.

After three amazing days fishing with my dad and our friend Dal (Dick and Steve were in the other boat), I began to understand more clearly what Richard Rohr and John Eldredge have been getting at when they say that Christianity has become too domesticated and prettified, where men and male spirituality is concerned.  The point was driven home while fishing off of the dock in the late evening with some men from the other group that was also at Fletcher Lake.  Even though it was a company trip, some of these men had been coming up together as friends for over 30 years!  I had talked with some of these guys over the years, when our trips happened to overlap, and the short conversations would usually devolve into a “why I don’t go to church” confession of sorts.  But this year the conversation took a different turn when the subject was not church but male spirituality (I had been telling them about my sabbatical focus in this area).  Two of the men perked up and excitedly told me about their spiritual connection through nature and why they always looked forward to coming up to the wilderness of Canada.  One man stretched out his arms and loudly declared, “This is my church!”  The other man quickly added, “I feel closest to God when I’m up here.”  Instead of asking them if they go to church or not, and if not, why not, I thought of a different question to ask in response, “Have you ever felt close to God in a church?”  The first guy shook his head no and gave me a look that said, “are you kidding me?”  The other looked like he was trying to remember something before saying, “One time, a long time ago when I was a kid.  It was an evening service, some of the lights were off and there were lots of candles.  I think there were a lot of different readings with silence in between, no sermon, there was communion.  Then we left in darkness and silence.  That was really powerful, but that was a long time ago.”  (In further talking we figured out he had attended a Good Friday Tenebrae service at his Catholic church).  Neither goes to a church, only for weddings, funerals, and some holidays.  But both agreed there was something important and special that they experienced, which they named as God, when they were in nature, out in the wild.  They did not experience God back in the cities, at work or home, and most definitely not at church.  Only when they were out in nature, close to the earth, in a way unlike anywhere else, were they at least aware of and open to God.  If I had had more time perhaps we could have deepened our conversation.  Perhaps next year.

If you created a time line of your spiritual life, and highlighted those times and places you experienced God, what might you discover?  Give it a try this summer and pay attention to where and how you’ve been open to God’s presence.

May 19
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If you don’t try…

Posted on Tuesday, May 19, 2009 in Male Spirituality

 

You never know what you might catch.

You never know what you might catch.

If you don’t try, you’ll miss the chance at something big.

In case you didn’t know, that big creature my friend Matt is holding in the picture taken by our friend Tim, is a big muskie.  43 inches, and about 20 lbs.  It wasn’t what we were expecting to catch on  the fishing opener.

Our intention was to go fishing, just the three of us, and spend some time together, again, just the three of us.  Tim graciously had us out to their cottage on Lake Minnetonka, and off we went on his boat for a morning of fishing.  There is a reason it is called “fishing” and not “catching.”  In spite of the cold and lack of action, we had a great time talking and catching up with each other (no pun intended).  It was great!  I love spending time with these guys, my friends from high school days gone by.  Great male bonding!  No fish.

It was time to head in for lunch before going our separate ways, and time for a few final casts off the dock for fun, because, well, “You never know.”  That’s when this lug hit the line!  What fun!  What a surprise!!

How often do I give up in life?  Why do I listen to those inner and outer voices of negativity, that tell me not to try something, or give it another shot?  Regret weighs heavy on my soul for the things in my life I have left undone, unsaid, and untried.  Mostly because I know that I may have missed something big, something awesome, and something wonderfully surprising.  

In case you haven’t figured it out, I’m not talking about the fish.  I’m talking about taking the time, making the time to spend with two of my best friends.  If  you don’t try…

May 17
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The First Step in Listening to God…STOP

Posted on Sunday, May 17, 2009 in Male Spirituality

“Remember the Sabbath Day and keep it HOLY…on the seventh day I [the Lord] rested.  That is why I, the Lord, blessed the Sabbath Day and made it holy.” – God (Exodus 20: 8 & 11)

Evidently even God needs to rest, which is a pretty profound thought to ponder.  So, if God needs a little rest, a snooze, and some time off on a regular basis, isn’t it great that the Lord God Almighty thought it would be pretty neat if we’d do the same.  Maybe Yahweh knows that we need rest more than we will admit?  

“Shabbat” literally means to STOP.  

Stopping is something we resent and try to disregard any chance we get.  We run stop signs and stop lights.  And, oh, don’t we love getting stopped in traffic!  Stopping is a sign of weakness, failure even.  ”Don’t stop thinking about tomorrow, don’t stop, it’ll soon be here,” or so the song goes.  I hate to stop.  Just give me some more coffee and I’ll keep going.

But if we don’t stop, we will never find rest, the kind of rest that God needs and wants to share with us.  It also turns out that the first step to listening to God is to stop.  Perhaps finding rest in God and truly listening to God are close to the same thing.  Staring later this week, and for the duration of this gift and blessing of sabbatical time, I hope to find out for myself.  I’ll keep you posted.

May 8

Read Along with PK

Posted on Friday, May 8, 2009 in Male Spirituality, Young Adults

Pick a Book

Need a little light reading, or something a little more challenging while at the cabin, camping, or on vacation this summer?  Have I got the deal for you!

Here are three books to choose from that I will be reading over the summer, under the overall theme of “passing on the faith.”  When I get back I will be meeting with each group that read a book to discuss what we learned and how that might impact our ministries at church.  You can find and order these books online at Amazon.com, Augsburg Fortress, Male Spirituality, or Barnes and Noble.

3 to choose from

Frogs Without Legs Can’t Hear,” is written by David Anderson and Paul Hill, from the cutting edge Youth and Family Institute, here in the Twin Cities.  For too many years people have thought that spiritual growth and faith development happened primarily at a church, taught by professionals.  Over the last 50 years or so, this has led to the many bad habits and attitudes that in fact inhibit growing faith in children, youth, and young adults.  The critically missing piece is that faith is formed primarily during the other  167 hours spent outside and away from the church – with the family as the FIRST CHURCH!

At the end of June I will be participating in the Male Rites of Passage in northern Minnesota.  This spiritual retreat for me was developed by Father Richard Rohr and the Men as Learners and Elders (M.A.L.E.S.) program that is part of the Center for Action and Contemplation.  In the book “Adam’s Return: The Five Promises of Male Initiation,” Father Rohr describes the many reasons why men need to reclaim and experience initiation in the 21st century, and the lessons and promises that are gained and learned through male initiation.

For the past year I have been meeting monthly with a spiritual director in a group setting with other clergy.  This has helped me in my own spiritual journey and growth, by helping me listen to God.  Pastor, professor, and author Eugene Peterson has written about this subject in his book, “The Contemplative Pastor: Returning to the Art of Spiritual Direction.”  Peterson challenges pastors and congregations to reclaim the spiritual basics and core role of pastors as spiritual directors in the midst of the busyness and demands of “running a church.”

If any of these books is of interest to you, search for them on the websites I’ve provide, order your copy and start reading.  I really look forward to hearing what others think about the issues brought up in these books next fall!